Although 95% of my family and friends do not actually wear hats, all “hats” are removed outside my door. They can be retrieved and adorned as you exit, but please, before entering my home, “hang your hat”.
Most people do not understand this concept. Over the years, I have gotten many odd looks and have seen the complete confusion on my visitor’s faces as they point or touch their physically hatless heads. At times, it’s actually been quite comical and I have often wished I could hear their exact thoughts. Although I cannot hear what others think, their expression and body language clearly depict these words: “Wipe my feet” or “remove my shoes” I can understand, but “Hang my hat”, has she gone completely insane”?
As a freshman in High School, I had the most amazing English teacher. She told us a story about a man who would always “hang his hat” before he entered his home.
He had a modest family of 5, worked hard and made an honest living. Money was always tight, and he barely brought home enough money to put food on the table and keep a roof over their heads. Yet, somehow he managed to walk through the door after every workday with a smile on his face and his arms outstretched to hug his wife and children.
As they would sit and eat their small meal, he listened intently while his family filled him in on the day’s events. No matter what they discussed, he would always smile and help with any advise he could. The children were so full of life, always bursting with energy and excitement despite the lack of nourishment in their stomachs. If you were looking in through a window, you would never know how “poor” they were. The content and happiness in their home far exceeded what any dollar amount could bring.
When dinner was completed, Dad would bathe the children and dress them in their bedclothes. He would then read them a story and tuck them in under the warm and cozy afghans Grandma had so lovingly crocheted. Once they were fast asleep, he would help his wife finish the last of the dishes then sit beside her in front of the fireplace.
Every evening, she would ask the same question, “How was your day”, and every evening she would receive the same answer, “It was perfect”. She knew the hard labor his job entailed, she knew the little pay he received and she knew the long, exhausting hours he worked, but yet he would never complain.
As the years progress, naturally the children grew and began families of their own. The eldest son, now 24 with a wife and 2 children to provide for, returned home for an unexpected visit. Mom brought him a glass of lemonade and placed it front of him on the kitchen table. Noticing the concern in his face, she asked how he and his family were doing. Just as he began to tell her how the factory was closing and the financial crisis he and his family were in, Dad walked through the door. As usual, Dad was smiling and his arms were outstretched waiting for a hug from his wife.
His son looked at him in amazement, as he began to say, “Dad, you work for the same factory, how can you….”his father put a finger to his lips and asked him not to speak about it in the house. As father and son walked outside and closed the door, the son was completely speechless. Once he finally worked up enough courage to break the silence, Dad stopped him once again. He then pointed to a small tree on the walkway to the house and explained:
“This tree is the entrance to our home. Every day when I arrive home, I remove my “hat” and place it on this tree. The removal of my hat signifies the release of all my worries. After a long day at the factory, I walk to the front door, remove my hat and hang it on this tree. By doing so, I remove all the worries and stresses of my day. When I walk in the door, I walk in with no tension of how the bills will be paid, how the children will be clothed or how our next meal will be provided. I can then place all of my focus on family. I walk in with open arms and appreciate everything in which we have, while I embrace the warmth and love of our family. When I awake the next morning and head off to work; I take the hat from the tree and place it back on my head. With the hat back in place, I will then resume the daily worries. As every day passes and I head off to work, I leave my family knowing they are worry free. I then have a fresh start for work and am able to give 100%”.
Again speechless, the son hugged his Dad, got into his car and headed home. As he exited his car and walked up the walk to his front door, he paused, removed his invisible hat and placed it on a small tree his father had planted years ago when he purchased the home. He had often wondered why his father had planted that tree, as his yard was well shaded, but now he knew, it was a place to “hang his hat”. He walked in his front door, smiled and outstretched his arms for his family to embrace him.
The events of the remainder of this story are unknown. It has been a long, long time (more time than I wish to admit) since I was a freshman in high school, and, quite honestly, I wrote this story myself. I cannot take full credit for what I have written as “hang your hat” was story my English teacher once told. I took the moral of this story and ran with it.
If you have read this far, I honestly do not ask people to “hang your hat” before entering my home, yet perhaps I will now.
There are 2 morals to this story, 1. Never bring your work home with you (or vice versa) and 2. Appreciate what you have, regardless of how small it is, or how small you may think it is. There will always be light at the end of the tunnel, just be sure to “hang your hat” before entering.
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This post was written by Tracey on November 24, 2008
